however, that didn't work too.
don't ask me why. (",)
19.1.06
"kuya, ano yan?" my brother curiously quipped, pointing at a pile of dust on the floor.
"wala. gusto mo pakain ko sayo?" i bluntly replied.
and oh, yes, i have all the reasons to be grumpy, that is, from this day on. hey, look, it's january 19, 22 days since i last spoke up. and i believe this is the perfect time to say something, amidst raging adversity and controversy which is just too hard to ignore.
this is the time to cast off worries about physics formulae and failing marks, because i'll fare all the same if i won't address this thing.
so... let me see... what is it about, this time? hmmm.... put it this way. and bear with me, please.
how does it feel when you're the center of absolutely baseless and fictitious rumors? how do you feel when you answer a certain question for maybe, uh, let's say... n times, complete with justification and reasoning, and then you get shooed off because they tell you you're merely an unpredictable, unbelievable imposter? how much more when the false news spreads like wildfire within the bounds of your society?
i can answer that. it's freakin' hell, and i'm just about to freak out. i'm so f****** pissed. damn everyone.
so tell me... given the set of data earlier, is it wrong that i feel like the world's aiming all the WMDs at me, just to make me admit something that i never really felt or believed or experienced or what-have-you, when for all you know, you've been saying the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth all along? yes? then, tell me, please, what the heck am i supposed to do next?
mind you, it's not easy, functioning normally in this condition, like everybody's waiting for you to make a wrong move... can you blame me for being paranoid, when you, all of you, are the root causes of my anguish? who am i to be ignored, Beelzebub? bah!
i've answered your questions, with all due respect. now answer mine!
g_b got tired of senseless ranting by 22:10. |
it was just about now when i noticed that people write things about themselves in the profile section of their online diaries. then i looked at my former blog sites, and, it was like... whoa, am i really that weird?
so maybe it's time for a bit of change, a touch of conventionalism. for once, at least.
well, you see the guy in the picture? yeah, that spectacled boy running in haste? that's supposed to be me, j. gabriel de leon y limpin... what does j stand for, you ask? it's for me to know and for you to find out if you still don't know.
i'm a 16-year old boy who wears a pair of glasses, sports unkempt hair, and usually dons loose clothes. i might look a bit plump in the drawing, but in actuality i'm a tall, dark, skinny, frail guy who always forgets to drink his milk and take his breakfast. up to know i still wonder how come i stand at five-feet-eight-inches but weigh only 102 pounds...
way back then, i was a small, plump kid who showed a lot of promise. during parties, my mom and dad would usually strut around and boast of how intelligent, how healthy, how handsome i was. for eight or so years, that had been the case. i got my share of respect, like this little prince...
then came a heartbreak, and high school.
inexplicably, i suddenly became a complacent and idle guy who fell in love with my personal computer too much, even to the point of forgetting if i already had dinner. i was transformed into a student ridiculously full of potential but never getting to use the stuff. i developed a very healthy sleeping habit that made me garner the honorable distinction of being the student earliest for the nth class.
high school went on, heartbreaks pursued at will, and down to oblivion went that once promising young kid. so much for the pride of my parents.
today, i still look back to him. in fact, i'm trying to revive him, after four years of dormancy, or something more like stagnation. impossible, yes, but it's worth a try. too late, maybe, but i'll prove that it's not.
